Midlife crisis, generally troubling people between 40 and 60, has come to hit many Chinese in their 30s. Many living in first-tier cities and on the wrong side of 30 feel anxious and complain of identity crisis and other psychological perils.
My friend Cilin, who is turning 30 this year, began to feel anxious last year. She has been working in Beijing for over six years, occupied by a decent job. For her friends, she earns a good income and lives an enviable life in the capital city.
However, Cilin thinks she fell short of expectations from life. She worked very hard and got promoted soon, but found her career stagnating after some time. This made her change jobs a few times. Once jobless for about six months, she began to despair. Cilin lost her fighting spirit and was beset by anxiety and a foul temperament. She also sought the help of a psychologist to find solace.
Although now well-paid, she has limited savings after paying rent and all the other expenses every month. Her parents call her from time to time to remind her to find a boyfriend and get married soon.
"Sometimes I feel quite at a loss. There is a huge gap between my expectations and reality. Being 30 means you should have a career, a family and foothold in society. But I haven't achieved anything. Besides, I become more anxious when comparing myself with my successful peers who have stable jobs and happy marriages in my hometown and Beijing. When I go back to my hometown to celebrate the Spring Festival every year, I pretend in front of my parents and friends that I enjoy a good life in Beijing."
Her life is an epitome of what many young Chinese in their 30s, especially if they live in first-tier cities, are going through.
One's 30s may be a decade packed with adventure, excitement and new beginnings, but that milestone birthday can also inspire fear and anxiety.
The multiple life decisions including career and marriage, rising younger colleagues at work and the rapid development of knowledge cause Chinese 30-somethings to experience a midlife crisis.
Statistics from JSBR Consulting Center, a Beijing-based psychological consultation organization, show that people in their 30s constitute more than 41 percent of the population that experienced anxiety in 2016, the highest proportion compared with other age groups.
perhaps the deep dread among people in their 30s is born out of the old Chinese saying - "San Shi Er Li," which literally translates into "one should be independent and steadfast at the age of 30." But many have misunderstood it. For many who just graduated from schools and embarked on their career path, it is hard to establish themselves by 30.
The Confucian saying encourages people to gain spiritual independence and forge their own value systems by 30. But the current version deviates from its original meaning.
The anxiety that many people in their 30s suffer is normal as they are in a transitional phase. But they need to make an objective self-evaluation and should stop being too harsh on themselves. They should adjust expectations in line with reality, enrich their inner world by continuing to learn, develop their own lifestyle, and give themselves more say over their life.
Trump’s latest speech undermines pakistan’s efforts in fighting terrorism
By Aftab Hussain Source:Global Times published德国人防患未然放得开了个人换个地方干部哪儿发布的软件关闭南方的江南环保观念发生的: 2017/8/28 19:43:39
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US president Donald Trump's speech on Tuesday last week has sparked a debate in pakistan about pakistan-US relations and foreign policy experts have been pressing the US government to revisit its bilateral ties with the Islamic Republic.
In his speech, Trump announced new US policy for Afghanistan and South Asia and was critical about the role of pakistan in the region, blaming the country for harboring terrorism.
He also mentioned that, despite receiving billions of dollars in aid money, pakistan has not only failed to defeat terrorism in the region, it is on the contrary providing safe havens for terrorist organizations.
The pakistani government, on the other hand, has expressed its commitment to working with the international community towards the common objective of eradicating terrorism and promoting peace and stability in Asia.
Chief of Army Staff, Gen Qamar Bajwa, has told the US that pakistan does not need American aid. However, such a statement indicates that American policy shift in the region is widening the trench of distrust between both countries. Islamabad has been expecting American aid to decrease even more since last year, when the US decided to cut both military and economic aid to pakistan.
political analysts in pakistan consider Trump's speech as containing serious and baseless allegations against the country, which could result in the deterioration of Islamabad-Washington ties. Instead of praising the role of pakistan, the US has yet again betrayed the people of pakistan by undermining their efforts in the Global War on Terror (GWOT).
Since October 2001, the US has been engaged with Afghanistan and with its powerful military and technology. Despite spending billions of dollars, she has not been able to combat the Taliban or IS.
In fact, more than 40 percent of populated areas in Afghanistan are still controlled by such terrorist groups.
The US just does not want to admit its defeat there, like it was defeated in Iraq, and before that in Vietnam.
How can the US expect pakistan to eliminate terrorism overnight with its limited resources, limited technology and hostile neighbor (India), which is spending huge amounts of money to destabilize the country?
Nonetheless, pakistan has achieved a lot in terms of curbing the menace of terrorism. The people have made huge sacrifices in fighting it. In all these years, 2,403 US troops have been killed in Afghanistan.
By contrast, while acting as a frontline state in the GWOT, more than 70,000 pakistani people have lost their lives. The nation has also suffered economic losses amounting to billions of dollars. American aid provided to pakistan is incomparable to the economic loss incurred on pakistan because of the GWOT.
pakistan is an important regional country and without its involvement, the US cannot solve the issues in Afghanistan. What the US needs to do is to make a policy which considers the geo-political realities in the region.
Afghanistan has become a "bone stuck in the American throat;" it neither can swallow it nor wants to. If the US sees India as playing a greater role in Afghanistan, it would become yet another mistake that would make things worse rather than better.
Islamabad has more advantages when it comes to Afghanistan than any other country. Geographical proximity, the pashtun link, religious and socio-cultural ties and historical bonds are to name a few.
But the US is not ready to help pakistan bring peace in Afghanistan, because it may not be in the national interest of the US. However, Afghans will never agree on any foreign solution for their local problem, dissent that still occurs today.
The US is seen by the world as an advanced and civilized nation and a role model for many countries in terms of its development and contribution to science and technology, democracy, human rights, education and exploration.
But unfortunately, the recent decisions of its political leadership are doing nothing but fueling the fire of anti-Americanism around the world.
The US needs to learn from China, which through its soft power has not only developed itself, but is helping its partner countries to develop too.
The world expects more serious policies from the Trump administration, which, in return, would ensure peace and stability instead of conflict around the world.
